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XBox Music set to launch

Prepare for a revolution. Sit down, strap in and get ready. Microsoft is on the verge of launching an amazing new system that will, wait for it, allow you to listen to the music you want, when you want and where you want. Wow. KitGuru finds a cool, dark room and lays down for several hours to recover.

Quoting Madonna to show how hip and cool they really are, Steve ‘Oh My God Am I Out Of Touch With What Is Cool Or What' Ballmer has authorised the launch of Microsoft's XBox Music service on 16th October (XBox users themselves) and 26th October for everyone else who's ‘lucky' enough to have Windows 8 at launch.

Some of the music will be free (you mean like radio?), some of it will require a subscription (you mean like Napster?) and some of it will need to be purchased one at a time (Wow. Cool idea. How DOES Apple sell music again?).

With his entire career and reputation riding on it, Yusuf Mehdi [Who? – Ed] will be giving customers one single program to run on every device they own – with the same selection of music.  Unless, of course, they own an Android phone or an iPhone or an iPad or a PlayStation.

We see some challenges here for Microsoft.

Offering the world's largest spread of Madonna tracks is good for the massive 4% of the world's cool-communication-device users. But the other 96% might not find it so useful.

"Hey, my name's Scott Porter and if you're like me - then Microsoft's brand new XBox Music is the cool way to access all your favourite Madonna tracks. Cool eh!" Sure Scott. Very cool. The young folk will be queueing up to pay $9.99 for your coolness each month.

KitGuru says: Spend $10 a month with Microsoft and you will get music – as long as you agree to suffer its new OS or new phones or new tablets. Essentially, Microsoft needs a reason for you to buy into its culture and, apparently, old Madonna tracks is the way. These Redmond chaps must be gaga.

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