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Wear the Intel everywhere, 1984 anyone?

Having cemented its position as the dominant player at the top end of the processor market, Intel is looking to spread its wings over the coming years – to evolve and permeate every part of society – leaving no (st)one unturned. Now, it seams, the tech giant wants to get into your jeans. KitGuru practices safe clothing when Intel’s PR machine comes to call.

Go back a few years, and the germ of a new idea was being discussed at Intel.

What if almost every finished product in the world had some kind of computer in it? They all have barcodes anyway when we buy them, so the idea of ‘some amount of processing’ built into every product we buy – or the labels that are attached to them in order to be sold – seems quite logical.

Once you have a computer inside a product, surely the next logical step is to connect them all together, reasons Intel.

And so the ‘Computing Continuum’ was born. That everything on the planet is computerised and every computer talks to the next – gives you 100% monitoring capability.

George Orwell must be laughing his arse off somewhere in the afterlife.

Million of investment dollars then came pouring into companies across the globe who were quick to take onboard Intel’s new concept.

Manny Vara is one of those charming people that technology companies employ to evangelise their technology. With gusto and enthusiasm, we’re now being told by Intel’s best spinners that we’ll have wearable computer technology in the 2-5 year time frame and that we should rejoice.

Does Intel think there is an immediate, amazing requirement for everyone to walk around with CPUs attached?  Not right now, it’s line to the public is that it is simply ‘enabling the future’ – and that the ‘cool uses’ will come into existence spontaneously.

Sure. That’s right. Cool uses. We can think of a few.

Microsoft is right behind this initiative (why aren’t we surprised?) and one of its research experts, Gordon Bell, has been quoted in Computer World saying “Certainly in 20 years, cell phones will have a pretty good memory of what’s going on in your life. With the changes in storage, GPS and cameras and audio and video, they’re important collectors. And then we’ll have the storage to save everything whether it’s in the cloud or on your home server”.

Or someone else’s server Gordon?

Saint Manny believes that you should be ecstatic at the prospect of walking around with Intel chips embedded around your person. Winston, on the other hand, was less certain. If only we had a big brother around for advice...

KitGuru says: What if you have security/monitoring questions?   No problem, it seems. There will be a whole range of jamming devices you can buy. Great. If ever there was a case of a technology looking for a use, we think we’ve found it. Now everyone sing together, “Rejoice, rejoice, you have no choice”.

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