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Vultures prepare to make killing over RIM’s torn carcass

We’ve quote Darwin so often on KitGuru, that it’s hard to believe that any technology companies have yet to wake up and start smelling what they’re shovelling. Motorola. Nokia and now RIM have all become victims of digging their heals in and being sure that they are god’s chosen one. It could be Apple’s turn next,. but with the mighty App Store behind everything it does, it’s hard to imagine what could go wrong enough to harm Steve Jobs’ legacy. For now, the big news looks to be the demise of RIM.

If you can’t adapt fast enough to change, then you become food. Right now, RIM is looking mighty tasty as a Wall Street fund manager’s snack, but just how much money could be people make on the company?

According to the trusty KitGuru abacus, RIM could be ripped apart and sold to the phattest bidder for just over $23 a share.

At the time of typing, RIM’s share price was rising past the $13 mark.

So, even if you wanted to avoid too much risk, you could probably buy into RIM for another $6-8 and still make a solid killing.

Whose money will end up in your bank account?  Well, the clever punters are predicting that most of it will come from Microsoft. Less from Nokia.

While the Finnish giant’s every move looks desperate, Microsoft still moves like a predator. Having hoovered up Skype and WordPress, while planting a console + Kinect  in every home, it makes sense for the Seattle giant to find a way to get inside your trousers. Blackberry phones might be staggering around aimlessly, but they may well fulfil a requirement for Microsoft’s Windows 8 mobile edition.

So, the big question: When RIM gets ripped to pieces, how much profit could investors pick up in the carnage?  Our completely unscientific calculation says that 500 million shares at $14.50, when sold on at $23, would generate $4.25 billion in profit. Something that RIM can never hope to imagine for its investors.

Who said RIM Apps are rubbish? Our mock-up shows the screen is just the right size to show how well the board's been doing.

KitGuru says: The worst thing about ‘life insurance’ is that you need to die to claim it. Same for any of the money RIM will generate by selling its butt cheeks to Microsoft for massaging.

Comments below or in the KitGuru forums.

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